In a small nod to anonimity, let's pretend that I work behind the counter at McDonald's. I don't and never have, although I am rather fond of a Quarter Pounder with Cheese Meal (large with a diet coke please).
Scenario One: In which no-one listens to me.
Me (to various colleagues): "You're making that burger without cheese. I think the customer may have ordered cheese on their burger"
Me (sometime later): "I'm pretty sure that your guy over there wanted cheese on that".
Me (via email): "I'm a little bit concerned that our customer ordered a cheeseburger, but we are currently only working towards a hamburger. I think that at this stage we should make it clear to the customer that he is only getting a hamburger".
Colleague: "I served the customer his burger and it turns out that he wants cheese on it, so we're going to have to add some onto it"
Me: *bangs head slowly and repeatedly against desk*
Scenario Two: In which someone tells me something that I just told them.
Me: "Here's your Big Mac, I haven't had time to do the fries just yet and I know that your friend asked for a milkshake. I'll get those over to you as soon as possible"
Colleague: "Thanks for the Big Mac, but you still need to provide the fries and the milkshake that my friend asked for".
Me: *hides under desk and softly starts to weep*
Scenario Three: In which instructions couldn't be clearer, but someone manages to cock it up anyway.
Me: "So you make the McFlurry by grabbing a container, putting it under the nozzle and pressing this button. Always add caramel, but only add sprinkles if the order specifically mentions sprinkles".
Colleague: *puts sprinkles on everything and sometimes also some Smarties just for fun*
Me: Ngngnggngngnggggngnggghhhhh *stabs self in eye with pencil*
Is this just me? Do you recognise any of these scenarios? Do you have some of your own to add? Feel free to share!
In Janathon news, I ran 3 miles this morning. I was only aiming for 2, but then my cunning Nike+ app asked me if I wanted one more song. I thought "Why the hell not?". It was a song I love to run to. So I ran to it. It was followed by another song I love to run to. So guess what I did? This is my longest run since I injured myself and I even tried a cheeky little bit of running on tarmac to see what would happen. And it's all good. Huzzah!
UPDATE
Scenario Four: In which I'm not told something that I do actually need to know
Me: "So I gave all of those ketchup sachets to Bob so that he could give them to customers with their fries"
Colleague: "Oh no, we're waiting to hear whether those sachets are ok to distribute, you shouldn't have given them to Bob".
Me: *crams fist into mouth to stop scream from coming out*
UPDATE
Scenario Four: In which I'm not told something that I do actually need to know
Me: "So I gave all of those ketchup sachets to Bob so that he could give them to customers with their fries"
Colleague: "Oh no, we're waiting to hear whether those sachets are ok to distribute, you shouldn't have given them to Bob".
Me: *crams fist into mouth to stop scream from coming out*